What if We Died Some More?

Frankly speaking, the foolproof technique is to die daily.

There is a nearly full-blown lament hovering in my heart as I write this, but it is before God that I shall table the matter. It is a subject that has left me breathless and restless with a brand of confused pain, and it has so unrelenting a hold that I have no choice but to deal with it.

Before I bring us up to speed concerning this matter that boggles my mind, I must first tell you what I discovered today. As I quietly walked around today to get some chores done around the house, I realised that the dominion with which we are commanded to subdue the earth doesn’t come cheap. There are certain pillars that are necessary for anyone seeking dominion to possess, and while I don’t claim to have the exhaustive list, I am certain of these three: faith, sacrifice, and obedience.

It goes without saying that you cannot build a God-sized legacy, bigger than any man could imagine (and not necessarily on the terms that humans define ‘big’ as), without faith. If you would call forth things that are not as though they were, and build things that eyes haven’t seen or imagined, you need faith in the only One who can do these things.

As for sacrifice, we know that one’s harvest is commensurate with their sowing. If you sow sparingly, you reap sparingly, but if you sow bountifully, you reap bountifully. It is that simple. You cannot be talking about kingdom financing if you barely pay your tithe, and or taking the entertainment industry like a storm if you barely pray.

Many of us have no problems with the aforementioned two and have grown in them as God enables us. Or maybe not, for there are some of us to whom the subject of sacrifice, or faith, or both is alien. However, in this particular post, my focus is on obedience.

Now, to the matter I pointed out earlier as distressing, why is it so hard to do exactly what God said to do? I know I talked about the flesh yesterday and how it’s constantly in opposition to the spirit, but I feel a need to deepen the conversation by narrowing down to the subject of self. That force of self-will, self-autonomy, and self-governance that insists on rebelling against God, whispering melodies of stubbornness into our ears, and we lap it up like we are dying of thirst. Why, oh why, why is it so much harder to do EXACTLY as the Lord commanded? Why is there a force within that opposes my submission? And why do I have to fight it all the time?

It’s almost like my faith walk is on a two-way lane; the part that adores God, and the part that struggles against the harsh reality of life; that there is warfare going on, and that even obedience may often be a costly choice. Especially if it is an ongoing surrender, and not a one-and-for-all-time obedience.

The frustration I feel at my imperfection, and even outright rebellion sometimes, is palpable. I wonder why I do the things I do, and why it’s so hard to do the right thing sometimes. I know that Paul seems to have experienced a similar struggle, and somehow it is comforting to feel like he wrote to me (Romans 7:19). I want to surrender for all time, but then I remember the fight to stay sane in the waiting, and the mere thought ignites an array of questions in me. I learn that obedience is an art never fully mastered by mere strength, and that it is a muscle always to be exercised.

But what if we died more often? Even in the littlest ways, what if we held back, delayed gratification, sacrificed a little more often? Not in an act of religion but as an exercise in bringing the body under subjection, bearing in mind the possibility of preaching to others yet being disqualified (1st Corinthians 9:27). Would it help? If we died more? Daily?

Selah.